Sound.

I'd have to say I'm fairly good at blocking the sound of my day out, but some days you're just open to the world, you know? The singing of the train tracks in the morning, the hum and rumble of traffic, the squeal and sigh of the train as it skids to a stop, protesting all the way.

The office is quiet, staccato barks and clicking keys, water poured and sipped and gulped. The murmur of new hires 'thankyouthankyouthankyou' and the shifting weight of the building as coworkers swish by, swiftly, quickly, rushing to business or busy-ness.

Walking home is squeaky shoes and the flap-flap of bags too heavy, legs and feet sore, slapping the sidewalk. Train bells and snippets of radio, bass too loud or too low, thrumming through your bones. That's the way the bus feels, too, as it labors over the potholes, whining and shaking, a lumbering beast  working hard to be oblivious to the world around it.

Home is two paws thumping, two paws scratching, big excited gulps of air too fast around a chew toy. Its the jangling of keys and the jangling of the leash and the burst out the door to the nightly walk.

Once we hit Ninth Street the sounds of the city fall away and we're left with lonely cars and squeaky garages, quiet little plots, house and home, carefully tended and watered by hand. We descend again to the city, leaving the mountain stillness where it was- exposing ourselves to the buzzing neon lights and seven o' clock train horns.

I hear it every day but I tend not to listen. What else in the world am I missing?

Vigilance

Today's word is vigilance.

noun
1. state or quality of being vigilant (keenly watchful to detect danger; wary); watchfulness
2. pathology, insomnia (ever awake and alert)
adjectives: alertness, attention, heedfulness, concern, care

Vigilance looks a little like me these days. My hair may be coming undone and my house is going through some pretty rapid seasons of clean, then messy then back again. But I have my eye on the big picture and I'm doing something about our future, so all the rest is small potatoes.

I wake up with a smile on my face more often than not these days- eager to go to work. I've certainly never come across that before. I'm easily here 6 days a week, scooping up those overtime hours by the armful. I enjoy what I'm doing, I enjoy the people who work here and I'm putting forth my every effort to get hired permanently. The idea of having a steady job to rely on while Mr. E works to learn the ropes of the industry makes me just want to burst.

I'm writing, too. That is a lot of the reason why I'm not around the blog as much. It seems like everyone and their mother these days is writing, so I figured I'd try my hand at it. The fact that it's a mostly free creative project didn't go unnoticed either. Mr. E and I are both at the computer, typing up stories, bleeding out words in the hopes that something will form itself into a short story or a screenplay to use.

Vigilant is Mr. E spending half of his day keeping up with contacts around the city, dropping his name in an effort to stay relevant and noticed and remembered. The film business is less about the job postings and more about the people you know and the projects you're willing to tolerate for the next gig. He's been so great about keeping the house together, walking the dog and running errands in between resume revisions and phone calls. It's all foundation work.

Even Ripley is vigilant lately. Mr. E took a short stay-cation to the mountains with a friend to hammer out some screenplay ideas away from the hustle and bustle of the city. Rips didn't let a single hour go by without pausing what she was doing and staring intently at the door, waiting for her favorite snuggle buddy to rattle his keys. She wouldn't even sleep with me, choosing instead to sit at the foot of the bed, face towards the door in the hopes Mr. E would creep to bed in the dead of night as he's been known to do.

So sorry if there's not much going on in the way of keeping anyone updated. I have crafts and recipes and all sorts of stories to tell you, but in the mean time you'll probably find us on Twitter (@thEccles and @danofthe) or on Instagram (@brieccles and @danofthe) because you can never have too many Ripley photos in your life.

Bacon Cinnamon Rolls

I have lots to say to you. Really. I do.

But life hasn't just creeped in the way, it's stomping around with bells and singing boisterously, making sure that I'm paying attention.

More on that later.

Honestly, I think it's fitting that when I come back to write to you all that it's about bacon. Because priorities.

I had seen this recipe around the web for a while, but I wrote it off as outlandish and extravagant. Who really needs bacon IN their cinnamon rolls? THIS GUY.

In a stroke of culinary luck I had a small tupperware of cream cheese frosting left over from baking a carrot cake the other week. That's enough excuse to make cinnamon rolls, right? And when you have an unopened package of bacon...it all just rolls together, pardon the pun.

These days I'm feeling the urge to "Rachel Ray" everything- make my life easier by using pre-made ingredients, working with what you have. We bought Pillsbury crescent rolls for Lil' Smokies, but never got around to using them. So our recipe is sort of janky- and could be upgraded for those who have the desire.

Bacon Cinnamon Rolls
1 tube Pillsbury crescent rolls
2 Tbsp butter
1 Tbsp sugar/cinnamon mix
4-6 slices of bacon

Instead of using the pre-formed triangles in the rolls, I used a pizza cutter to make slices. I then microwaved the butter and sugar/cinnamon mix together until it was completed melted and brushed it all over the dough.

You need to cook your bacon for a few minutes before adding it to the rolls- you don't want to rely on the dough/oven to cook your bacon for you. Just enough that it's not raw, but not so much that it's stiff. You want something that will roll. We didn't do real well with that step, but breaking it into pieces seemed to work too. Besides- then you have ready made snacks while the rolls are cooking. I'm just sayin.

Roll up and cook for approximately 12 minutes at 375 F.

Ours turned out a nice dark gold and very flaky on the outside- and since we had rolled them up so tight to keep the bacon in, some of the middle wasn't cooked as well, but it was just a little soft and squishy, not necessarily doughy.

Top with frosting and enjoy!

Step One: Choosing the Right Partner

Day one of How To Make Your Husband Do What You Want (HTMYHDWYW or WYW for short)

Let's just start with the basics. 

Square One. First Step.

You cannot change your husband. 

I'll say it again because I don't think people realize this like they think they do. 

You CANNOT change your husband. 

 Only he can do that. If he wants. 

The long and the short of it is: you get what you marry. So choose wisely.

So what's a woman to do when she's looking for her husband to want to clean the dishes? Or to run errands in his free time? Or cook dinner without being asked?
Unless these things happened before marriage I can almost guarantee they won't happen after marriage barring a drastic change on someone's part.

Let's just call an apple an apple and collectively realize that marriage is not a magic threshold which you step over and become a completely different person. Things are not drastically different between the two of you. 

I think we've built up this nigh unattainable expectation of what men (and women) should automatically do after the ring slips on the finger. Once the vows are exchanged women waltz off to maintain the household and men spend their days providing and supporting- monetarily or otherwise. Or maybe that was just me. 

No matter how many times you cajole or plead or guilt, your man will not magically start fulfilling your expectations of the perfect man just because the wedding is over. We don't even have to call out men specifically here- wives are just as guilty of this as husbands.
To get him to do what you want you first need to ask yourself- is this the right man? Does he have the same marital and relationship goals as I do? Will he comfort and strengthen me? Will he protect and support me in my decisions? You won't be able to rationalize a change of heart with a husband who has no intention of changing.

Despite our rockin' relationship, Mr. E and I were adamant about pre-marital counseling. We were young and came from very different backgrounds, so we wanted to be serious about the commitment we were going to make. Plus, having a third party mediate some of our more intense conversations was incredibly helpful. Granted, the results weren't that eye-opening since we're honest with each other. After three years we had settled into a communicative dialogue, but it was an important step for us to commit to being on the same page regardless of how "in love" we felt. We were both kind of bogged down with this nebulous idea that marriage solved problems, brought us closer together and would be all around awesome. And this was kind of true. We sort of focused on the same things, enjoyed similar tastes and had goals and priorities that meshed rather than clashed. What we learned was how to communicate effectively and understand what the expectations were for ourselves and for each other. 

Marriage isn't a solution for a relationship that is not entered into mutually. You can't assume bad habits are erased, that apathy will be discarded for enthusiasm or that feelings will change once you're hitched. 

Because we talked about our expectations neither of us was really hit with any surprises after marriage: Mr. E sits on the couch and plays video games online with his brother while I'm stirring stir-fry and wiping counters. I chose a partner with the mostly full knowledge that his habits and interests weren't going to change after August 2011, and Mr. E did the same. I still hold deep grudges and want a clean bathroom, but Mr. E wasn't side-lined with a passive aggressive Lysol-Nazi come Marriage Day One.

The best advice I ever received was two-fold. 

First, that you choose who you fall in love with. In fact, you make that choice everyday, sometimes multiple times a day. Ultimately the only person keeping you in a marriage is yourself- your beliefs, your convictions, your choice to continue (or not) loving your husband. 

The second, is that you should always give 110% to your partner. If you're focused on each other the rest will fall into place. So instead of fighting against the nature of your husband, frustrating yourself and your partner, understand that you get what you have always had. Marriage doesn't change his personality.

31 Days of Blogging: How to Get Your Husband to Do What You Want

The Nester's 31 Days of Blogging is here! I wrote what I know best...

I have a rockin' relationship with my husband. I'm not bragging and I'm not comparing (though we'll get to that later)- it's just the God's honest truth. I'm crazy about Mr. E and I'm not afraid to say it. Or blog about it. I think it's sort of evident, though, when we have friends ask us how we do it. In truth, it's a little embarrassing to hear people "want" a relationship like yours. We're human, too! We have fights and arguments and problems just like anyone else! But what is it that makes us so special? Why are we the poster children for a great relationship?

Because I've figured out how to get my husband to do what I want.

This sounds crazy. Downright impossible.
First of all, this implies control or domination of some sort that isn't actually present between my husband and myself. There's no pants-wearing, no exclusive shot-caller. This isn't about orders or rules.

Second of all, husbands are not machines. This isn't some month-long rant about secretly gaining the upper hand in your relationship, or manipulating your significant other to your every whim.

I am not an expert, but I think I've been advised enough times by countless married, unmarried, living together, "it's complicated", significant other-d couples to know a thing or two about what works for us. And may work for you. These are words of wisdom as interpreted by myself...and my husband.

This isn't perfect. This isn't fool proof. But I firmly believe that this a start to encouraging a relationship between partners...in other words your husband will do whatever you want.

Step 1: Choosing the Right Partner
Step 2: Fostering a Positive Environment
Step 3: Indulge Him
Step 4: Hold Your Horses. And Your Temper. But Not That Knife.
Mr. E on How He Does What He Wants
Step 5: Accept Blame
Step 6: Choose Your Battles
Step 7: Show Him Some Love
Step 8: Be Frank (But Mostly Yourself)
Step 9: Leading By Example and Pulling Your Own Weight
Step 10: Avoiding Comparison
Mr. E on Service
Step 11: Don't Set Him Up to Fail
Step 12: To Get You've Got to Give
Step 13: Bribery
Step 14: Make Him Choose
Step 15: Change What You're Asking For
Step 16: Communicate Your Desires
Mr. E on How Cooking is Good for Your Relationship
Step 17: Timing is Everything
Step 18: Be Honest (?)
Step 19: Politeness Isn't Just for Strangers
Step 20: Ask, Don't Tell
Step 21: Short and Sweet
Step 22: Stop Trying
Mr. E on Balancing Work and Home
Step 23: Love Languages
Step 24: Are You Focused?
Step 25: Some Things to Not Do. No Matter How Tempting
Step 26: Know Your Limits
Step 27: It's Okay to Fight. Just Do It Fairly.

Last Day of Summer

We spent the last day of summer at the LA County Fair. Mr. E and I have gone to the fair almost religiously every year- usually San Diego County, then last year at the Orange County and then we missed BOTH and had to settle for LA. We've determined Del Mar is the best- as OC was incredibly boozy and LA was too spread out.

We sorely missed all of the crazy booths and products. Where were the SHAM-WOWS? The dog brushes and the popsicle-makers? The stained glass and the personalized bracelets? We were impressed with the hanging terrariams (below) and the iron work, but they were small potatoes compared to the fried food.

We're crazy about that fried food. We've tried something crazy every time we go to the fair- because if not then, WHEN? Bacon-wrapped pickles. And deep-fried watermelon. Amazing.

We made it a double date with one of the friends who introduced us to each other (him) and his girlfriend. The best part of the fair this year was our $5/3 cupcake frosting class! Look at these adorable farm animals we created! That's Mr. E's pig down there- despite the fact that I'M the cake decorator in the house!

Goodbye, summer. We had a hard time enjoying you, what with the move and all. But now we're firmly ensconced here in Burbank and we plan to enjoy every pumpkin-flavored confection fall has to offer. Bring on the season of cream cheese.

Movies This Week:
The Crow

The World's End




Major League

Pros and Cons

I know this is a lot of home-related posting- but all of my craft projects are packed away! Besides, cooking and baking is more in the manner of "eat what's quick" lately, so bear with me.

After being in the new house for a month and some change, it's time to total the tally marks in favor and against this new apartment.

The stove clock is broken. We hit one o'clock four times a day.

This is actually dinner, guys.

There is only one bathroom. We might have cockroaches. But they're actually tiny cockroaches, only one at a time and only in the bathtub. They sort of look like Wall-E's buddy until they're squished. The steam from our shower sets off the fire alarm. There's a bathtub. With a seat. Aaaaand a scum ring I'll have to clean once a week.

Air conditioning.

Our drawers are too tiny for dividers. The hot water goes from "meh" to "sixteenth degree burns" in .6 seconds.

There is no room for our grill.

Our stuff is actually in three different places.

This is how I figured out my gallery wall....

It costs $11.50 to do all of our laundry for two weeks.

I am getting mad crazy organizing done, yo. Remember, this is what it looked like when we moved in!

 I love it, but now that the house is organized and put away, let's see about that job, shall we?

Dilemma Solved

Ask and ye shall receive.

A while ago I posted my decorating dilemma: how to hang my gallery wall in our new bedroom. After a few nights of rearranging and some very well-timed Pinterest pins (thanks, Jenny!), we slapped all those suckers on the wall!

No frames were harmed in the process, though our pride might be bruised.

I'm more of a "hang it then fix it later" type of gal, but this drives Mr. E batty. So to compromise I traced all of our frames onto packing paper and taped them to the wall so we could move them around as we pleased. No holes, no spackle, less mess.

The arrangement we decided to go with

Then, when you want to hang, add a little dab of toothpaste to the back of the frame where the nail should go, level and press against the wall. You get a dab of paste right where you need to hammer the nail with no extra holes.

That little blue dot is toothpaste

After a while I got a little toothpaste happy- where I was putting toothpaste willy-nilly on frames that actually had hangers...

But they're all finally up and frames aren't littering the floor anymore, so we're all good. Phew.

It's all about utilizing your space wisely in such a small apartment, so the opposite wall looks a little something like this...

Now if only it wasn't so freaking hot.

Color Me Happy

I can divide the years of my life into colors.

When I was young, before any siblings, my color was shadow gray. Dark corners and cloudy skies, hallways and bedrooms and closets with very little light. My memories are unfinished and rough around the edges, like I'm straining to see too hard inside my head.

Then my brother and sisters came and we were all color-coded. Those were my purple years- down jackets and Easter baskets and lidded cups at grandma's house. Everything was some shade of violet or lavender or plum. I'm not sure if I ever truly liked purple or if I just stuck to my guns- a slip up of some sort that I was too embarrassed to correct. I have always been conscious of pleasing others but my assumptions of what was right weren't always true to myself.

I stepped away from purple for black. I found eyeliner and Hot Topic, determined to fit myself into a mold I didn't understand. I assumed it had to be better than the boys and organized sports my blonde contemporaries enjoyed- neither of which I excelled at. I drifted in and out of degrees of black, trying to find myself. Instead I found others, bruised and damaged and alone. Black was transitional.

I hoped that high school was teal blue- the sort your girlfriends paint on your toes or the color of your favorite sweatshirt. It's the color that people notice you in and the one you wish your eyes were. In reality I was surrounded by brown. My hair, my eyes, my school colors, the scrub brush that surrounded our little island in the hills. I couldn't run away from brown but I sure tried- as evidenced by my bleached blonde bangs at 14.

College was yellow. Bright, vibrant, cheery. I thought if I projected a happy color on my surroundings then the anxiety I felt at not fitting in would be easier to forget. It worked after a fashion. Mr. E's house had butter walls and I let everyone know my future kitchen would be decorated in sunshine hues. And it is.

2011 was green. The color of new beginnings and growth and luck and our wedding. It's my little brother's favorite color and was represented in varying shades by all of my new extended family. It's the color of leaves through the windows and forever hills during road trips but most of all it's the color of Mr. E's bright eyes as we said "I do".

Last year was tangerine orange. A color to strike all other colors down. One that shouts and declares and uses exclamation points, dammit!, but it has a softer sherbert-y side too. The color of our first kitchen as a married couple and my favorite necklace. A color with moods and attitudes as changeable as I am.

Now?

Now we're blue. Blue blends in, it stands back. It's neutral enough to mix and match and feel our way to exactly what we want to be or do or say in our new lives. Blue is accepting and comforting and unassuming.
Blue is my springboard.
Blue is my gateway.
Blue is my starting point.