It wasn't that long ago that I was running exhausting games of tag, tumbling through grassy fields that stained my toes and swaying to and fro on exhausted tire swings. I left the worries to someone older and wiser than myself, content and carefree. Then I grew up. While the time may have come for me to put aside my childhood activities, it doesn't mean that I can't backpedal every once in a while for the sake of my sanity. I ate pie today. For breakfast. For the third day in a row. I gave piggyback rides and watched cartoons and sucked on cotton candy and played with Legos this week.
Stressful situations in our house are like colds- someone has it and the next thing you know EVERYONE has it. We're all snuggling into couches clutching our heads and drowning ourselves in water and Throat Coat. It's easy to wallow. It's so easy to sit back and complain and throw out all the wrongs and the mistakes and the don't-feel-like-its. We carry a lot of weight on our shoulders- the expectations and obligations tugging us all different directions. There are some days when all we'd like to do is lay prostrate on the couch, allowing Netflix to touch our very souls and imbibe way more (homemade!) pizza than is normal for two graduated not-so-newlyweds. Every inch of me is screaming for more sleep, more coffee, more time, and I'm carving out the moments I need to stay sane. This week those moments have been full of abandon, unrestrained or downright childish. I baked apple pie and ate it with apple pie goat cheese. Mr. E and I saw Monster's University, only to come home and disassemble his extensive Lego sets in our first step towards packing.
I have been so preoccupied with the never-ending things that I need to do I haven't focused on the things I've accomplished.
It's okay the dishes have circled that poor sink for the last two weeks. The bed was made today. It's okay our towels and swimsuits were thrown into a ball on top of the washer. We were below budget for our grocery trip this month. It's all a give and take, Mr. E and myself crafting our home and our lives, weaving an enclosure to shut out the harshness of the world. We're stressed but we're working on it. We're feeling heavy with the weight of to-do lists and appointments but it's the beach days and the surprise parties and the movie nights that pull us together. Sometimes we just have to get in touch with our inner child and put all of those adult problems on pause, to play with the puppy and enjoy hot dogs from the grill, dance parties after a long day and stuffing ourselves with spiked smoothies. Before long this too shall pass and we'll be longing for when days were this easy.