Lemon Bars

What do you do when life hands you a bag of lemons you find a bag of free lemons in the break room at work?
You take them home to make lemon bars, of course.

Because clearly I can't get enough butter in my system.
(The great thing about a break room? You can get rid of all those extra fattening things you shouldn't be eating...made cookies? Take 'em to work)

I followed a recipe that is near and dear to my heart: from the Alpha-Bakery Children's Cookbook by Gold Medal flour. This poor little cookbook is so -beat up- well-loved with all of the use it's seen since I started cooking. It made my little heart sing to see my niece with a Alpha-Bakery Cookbook as well- though a few of the recipes had changed.

Lemon bars
1 cup all-purpose flour
1/2 cup of butter (soft)
1/4 cup powdered sugar
1 cup of sugar
2 tsp of grated lemon peel
2 tbsp of lemon juice
1/2 tsp of baking powder
1/4 tsp of salt
2 eggs 

     Heat oven to 350. 
     Mix thoroughly flour, butter, powdered sugar in a small bowl. Press evenly with hands in bottom and about 5/8 inch of sides of an ungreased square pan 8x8x2 inches (If dough is sticky, flour fingers). This is the crust. Bake 20 min.
     Beat remaining ingredients ina  medium bowl on medium speed until light and fluffy. Pour over hot crust.
     Bake just until no indentation remains when touched lightly in center, about 25 minutes. Let stand until cook, then cut into about 1 1/2 inch square (or massive pieces because we like lemon in this house). Makes ~25 squares

Realistically, I made these for Mr. E's set- so I tripled the recipe, added more lemon anyways and baked them in whatever I had handy (which was Pampered Chef stoneware 9x13s). 

I think they went faster than my pancakes.

Where am I?

We have been roommate-free for almost two weeks now and I have to confess it's been a mixed bag of emotions.

On the one hand it's great- Mr. E and I are pretty well secluded in our own world. I like to think that we're still newlyweds (heck, we'll be newlyweds until kids), eager to spend all of our time together, making public appearances only when our Vitamin D has run low or we're out of anything green and leafy to eat. I always think of Gilmore Girls when Sookie tells Lorelai about being married to Jackson,

"We’re still newlyweds. We still sneak out of bed in the morning to brush our teeth, then get back in bed and pretend we just woke up smelling like that." 
That is my life. 

Perhaps a bit naive and a little delusioned, but I've been told repeatedly that I need to live in the moment more and stop worrying about the future. This is where I am.

I am weekend morning snuggles.
I am walking the dog to pick up my husband from school and work.
I am constantly re-arranging the couch from video game nights.
I am baking and baking and baking so that neither of us miss our moms as much.
I am pretending not to fall asleep during a movie.

I'll move forward when I have to (my more realistic side is already counting down months and to-do's until the big move) but in the mean time I am enjoying the time I have. Because I don't know that we'll ever get this again.

But. Having no roommate? Is stressful. 

The house is so empty with a bare room. We'll call out down the hall for Ripley and hear our voices echo and crash back at us, surprising our too-eager puppy. We'll watch a movie in the living room and I feel guilty that it's too loud- surely we're being inconsiderate- until I realize  it's nothing but a hollow room behind us. 

I've sort of informally dubbed this year "The Year of Less Worry". I've kept it to myself, sort of like a birthday wish, hoping that by staying silent my hope would become tangible. Ultimately I decided that I would rather own up and practice my wish for this year rather than leaving the responsibililty hanging. 

No roommate? We will find one.
Not making enough money? We'll finally get on that and Craigslist all that stuff in the garage.
Moving to LA this summer? I'll organize and clean and look for a new apartment. 

The rest will figure itself out.

Kill Bill Vol. 1

Mr. E has a strict rule about buying movies (weird, right? Film student extraordinaire): if the Blu-Ray is more expensive than a movie ticket, chances are we don't need it. Unless it's awesome.

Or on a really good sale.
Or it's Black Friday. 8 bucks for both Kill Bills.
Total. Steal.

Kill Bill Vol. 1

Imdb synopsis:

The Bride wakes up after a long coma. The baby that she carried before entering the coma is gone. The only thing on her mind is to have revenge on the assassination team that betrayed her - a team she was once part of.

Kill Bill is a story of revenge. A story you've heard before, but with twists and turns and quirks to surprise and entertain you. It might even gross you out a little bit. The situations may be far-fetched and slightly exaggerated, but the commitment is outstanding and frankly I think it's the honesty of the characters that makes you a believer. 

Tarantino is not for the faint of heart. But I think it's this extremism that has created his cult-following. It's precisely because his characters are so violent, so messed up and in such strange situations that viewers enjoy his movies. There are a lot of reasons to make movies, but it looks to me like Quentin does it because it's FUN. And that's something Mr. E and I can relate to.

Mr. E told me repeatedly that the crew members and friends on his set volunteered because they ENJOYED his film set. Everything was under control, crew was happy, and no one was unduly stressed. Apparently this doesn't happen often on student film sets and the only time I saw people with shifty eyes and mumbles of protest was when the pasta sauce wasn't heated (I BROUGHT the food, you can durn well heat your sauce yourself). 

It's when I hear stories like this that I realize this is exactly where we're meant to be. Mr. E is not just going to school, he's building a community to support and sustain his dreams of becoming a movie director. He's helping others by sacrificing his time and effort for the greater good of the movie- often not even HIS movie! He's becoming disciplined and focused and motivated, learning how to handle different view points, how to encourage his peers and how to quickly analyze priorities. Mr. E sometimes doubts himself, but all we need to do is remember the obstacles we overcame to get here and everything else looks like cake.

Or lemon bars. 
You know, whatever you have on hand. 

Blade II

I am a little hesitant to re-watch old movies now that Mr. E is a serious movie-maker. We usually enjoy the movies we watch (even if they're awful) because it's an activity we do together and we respect each others opinions.

But sometimes you just want to show your husband this great movie because it came out at a pivotal point in your life and it resonated enough with you that now you judge all subsequent movies of the same genre. So you watch it together and inwardly you're cringing at each corny line (did I really think that was cool) and over-acted pout, hoping he won't read as deeply into this as you initially wanted. And when it's done you both look at each other, agreeing that such a thing will never be watched in this house again because there's no point.

Turn around is fair play. Sometimes your husband tells you that your life has been missing a movie that puts YOUR movie to shame; that this movie was so great and hip he's surprised you never watched it. But when you finish that movie you look at each other again and realize you just wasted two hours because there was nothing in that movie you hadn't seen before or won't see again and can-we-please-see-the-sequel?

Blade II



Imdb synopsis: 
Blade forms an uneasy alliance with the vampire council in order to combat the Reaper vampires who feed on vampires.
(How many times can we use vampire in one sentence?)

Blade II is an awful movie- it's basically Guillermo del Toro's final rehearsal (without costumes) for HellBoy. There is too much gratuitous blood, too many "gun sounds" and too much hype. Honestly, I fell asleep for the last 20 minutes (in the movies minor defense, that doesn't take much these days) but I didn't care. I'm sure this was exciting when it came out, but it's not a movie that stands up to...anything.

Hugo

So, it seems kind of silly to have a husband exploring the film industry and not talk about our favorite movies, our criteria for enjoying movies or our favorite flops. Part of this was because I was nervous we would come of as hoity toity. 
Because we're not. 
I enjoy a lot of movies that Mr. E will find fault in and he likes a lot of gritty independent movies that I just can't stay awake through. But I think that's what makes it work. I'll watch almost anything with an open mind and Mr. E suffers in silence until the end (usually).

Sometimes there are movies that just tug at your heart strings or make you want to tell everybody about them and what better place than here? 

To start off...




Mr. E and I watched this on in 3D (perks of working at a movie theatre on campus)- something we don't usually do (the 3D, that is) but we felt obligated since it wasn't converted to 3D it was actually shot in 3D. This makes a difference in how the staging (blocking for those theatre types) is done, visual lines between the characters, objects in front of the camera or at the side of the screen- lots of "shooting" rules were bent or outright broken because this movie was shot in 3D and the audience could visually understand the difference. This isn't always something you think about, but when movies are shot there are standards to how characters look at each other, look past each other, interact with the environment, etc etc, and these rules make it fluid for the viewer not only to follow what's going on, but to be able to see it from many different angles. 

The movie itself was sweet- of course I'll read the book- full of longing and nostalgia and wistfulness. It sort of reminded me of March of the Penguins, because it seems to split the movie in two, both parts of the movie are equally interesting, but I was NOT expecting them to be together and the segue wasn't so smooth. Mr. E and I watched Hugo Cabret (Asa Butterfield) with interest because he's set to play Ender in a screen-adaptation of the science fiction novel Ender's Game. Fingers crossed he'll grow out of his wide-eyed child actor pose.

Since it was set it early 20th century Paris, there was lots of frizzy hair, skinny people, steam, soot, and references to death (sounds like most period movies). I think a lot of what you watch the movie for is the environment here- it showed all the drudgery of the times with as little of the sadness you usually see. 

While I understand that A Trip to the Moon is iconic, can we please stop using that infamous shot? This face creeps me out...

Chili

As a wonderful end to our weekend, Mr. E and I enjoyed home-made chili.

We had been talking for some time about the nostalgia of a crock-pot meal- the anticipation building as the smell tiptoes through the house, until you simply can't help but stir the slowly simmering pot. The warmth that emanates from a slow-cooker, calm and reassuring without the jarring beeps of the oven or the droning hum of the microwave. There's just something winter-like and snuggly about a bowl of slow cooked food.

And what's chili without cornbread? I followed the back of the Quaker container of cornmeal, although there's something about my mother's bread that is moist and cake-like. In our home we always ate it for breakfast, melted butter and oozing honey. Mine was a bit drier, but still golden and delicious.

Mom's Chili

 for a 4-5qt crock-pot
1 lb meat: hamburger or hamburger/sausage mix
1 large can of tomatoes (stewed, diced, chopped, however you like 'em)
add as many beans as you feel comfortable
 black
 pinto
 red
 kidney  (all staples in our home)
1 onion, diced (omitted for Mr. E's tender stomach)
1 bell pepper, chopped small
2 Tbsp chili powder
1/2 tsp cumin
LOTS of salt- for the beans

Cook on low for 6-8 hours- you'll smell it when it's done
If the chili looks too dry (you like it soup-y), add more tomatoes.

Ours came out drier than I would have wanted- but I didn't know the difference until I started spooning- with hardly any liquid! More like sloppy joe's, but we added cheese and chips and avocado. 

I must have done something right because Mr. E told me (at least!) 5 times how much he loved me during dinner. Time well spent!

Resolve

Four day weekends should happen every weekend. All the time.

I can't even wrap my head around how much Mr. E and I did this weekend.

We watched three movies in theatres (courtesy of a fabulous Christmas present)
organized the garage
re-sorted our plastic storage bins (and ended up with five empty ones!)
took down all the Christmas decorations
moved out our roommate
finished Sherlock season 2
finished my first Kindle book (Jenny Lawson's memoir)
visited the dog park
started a new Mario video game
inventoried our collection of books/DVDs
     ...and so many other around the house activities and errands. 

Our house is sadly open again (both metaphorically and literally, I guess). With the behemoth Christmas tree down the living room has more space than we remember- we'll have to make an effort not to fill it with useless clutter. And our roommate moving has been quite the fiasco: two possibilities lined up and then for one reason or another, both backed out. There's certainly no hard feelings, but I dread the new search for a roommate.

Another year come and gone, another year to look forward to. 

Mr. E and I were talking about the uselessness of New Years- neither of us have really celebrated it and we don't understand the hype.

But as I woke up this morning I thought about beginning anew. Fresh starts. Reinventing yourself. Making choices. And all the New Year symbolizes. It's more than just resolutions or goals. It's work. It's compromise. It's understanding- what's best for yourself and for those around you. Taking account all the things that have happened in the last year and making the choice to re-create or discard those experiences- to encourage new ones just as good and let go of those that may have hurt or harmed.

I want to experience joy daily. 
I want to strengthen my relationship with my husband and with my family by sending birthday cards. 
I want to have a stronger sense of self by meeting people's eyes when I talk to them, and standing up straight and saying "yes" instead of "yeah".
I want to take care of my health by eating produce 5x daily and flossing.
I want to become financially stable by saving more and budgeting our expenses.

Mr. E's resolution? He doesn't ever want to deal with department store price stickers.